Precious is a tough movie to watch.  It is the story of a 350-pound illiterate teenage girl.  She is pregnant for the second time.  But as she says at one point in the film, “I never even had a boyfriend.”  Her father abused her sexually and is the father of her children.  She is verbally and physically abused by her mother.  Nobody likes Precious.  She is obese and has little or no self confidence.  But a couple of people give her hope.

When the school Principal learns that Precious is pregnant, she helps her get into a special school.  There, one of the teachers helps her learn, and a social worker helps her deal with her home situation.  With their help, she blossoms.  This is a hopeful movie.  It shows how a teacher and social worker help build Precious’ self esteem and give her the courage to live life on her own. 

Precious received a 15-minute standing ovation when it was shown at Cannes.   I wanted to clap when it was over too.

The Blind Side is another movie about hope.  It is the true life story of Michael Oher, a professional football player for the Baltimore Ravens.  He was a very large black teenager living on the streets when he was welcomed into the home of a white conservative suburban family.  Sandra Bullock plays the mother – and she is great in the role. 

Michael and the family both grow over the course of the film.  He eventually gets a football scholarship to the University of Mississippi where he becomes and All-American player and a first round draft choice in the NFL.  It too, is a hopeful story.  It shows how one person, or one family, can make all the difference in another person’s life.  Michael Oher had great athletic talent that would have been wasted were it not for someone showing him some compassion and giving him some hope.

As these two movies show us, hope is powerful.  In The Audacity of Hope, President Obama (written before he became president) says…

“The audacity of hope.  That was the best of the American spirit, I thought – having the audacity to believe despite all evidence to the contrary that we could restore a sense of community to a nation torn by conflict; the gall to believe that despite personal setbacks, the loss of a job or an illness in the family or a childhood mired in poverty, we had some control – and therefore responsibility – over our own fate.  It was that audacity, I thought, that joined us as one people.”

This Thanksgiving I choose hope.  I am thankful for many things, but I am most thankful for my powerful self confidence.  It gave me the hope to start a consulting business 21 years ago and the hope to expand my business via the internet.  I choose hope.  I choose to be audacious, moving to a new business model when many people my age are retiring.  I urge you to be audacious and choose hope.  Hope begins with being aware of and thankful for all you have.  It helps you move forward by building on those things for which you are thankful.

I also urge you to do whatever you can to give hope to others – your family, your friends, your co-workers, people at your place of worship, strangers.  Hopeful and kind words can make a difference in the lives of people around you. 

Self confidence is one of the keys to personal and professional success that is part of my Common Sense Success System.  I discuss it in several of my books: Straight Talk for Success, Your Success GPS and 42 Rules to Jumpstart your Professional Success. 

I’m a tennis fan.  That’s why I was very interested when I heard that Andre Agassi was writing an autobiography.  He was one of my favorite players.  I liked his style and flamboyance as a young man.  I watched him mature into one of the all time great players.  He won eight majors and has a career grand slam – meaning he won the Australian Open, the French Open, Wimbledon and the US Open at least once.  Only five other men have ever done that.  On the other hand, his wife, Steffi Graf, won all four grand slam tournaments in one year, 1988.  She won the Olympic gold Medal that year for good measure.  But that’s another story.

Andre’s book is disturbing.  Throughout most of his career, Andre Agassi says he hated tennis.  His father forced him to become a world class player.  In an interview he did with Katie Couric for 60 Minutes he talked about having ping pong paddles taped to his hands when he was a toddler.  He quit school at 14 to attend the Nick Bollettieri tennis academy.  He turned pro at 16.  He had early success on the court and off – lots of endorsements and a marriage to Brooke Shields.  However, he hated his life — and tennis.  He told Katie Couric that he “had to do it for the family.”

He partied hard – even doing crystal meth.  He fell to number 141 in the world rankings.  I saw him play in those down years.  I was at a meeting in Scottsdale and he was playing in a tournament near the hotel where I was staying.  I got some court side seats and was really excited to see him play up close.  He lost 6 – 2, 6 – 1.  In those days, he seemed to be entering tournaments just to get the appearance money.

However, in 1997 when he was ranked 141, he says he made a choice.  He chose tennis.  “The hate for tennis began to change when I took ownership and chose tennis, which didn’t happen until 1997, which didn’t happen till I fell to 141 in the world, which didn’t happen till that moment when I either had to walk away or choose it, and I didn’t walk away, I chose it.”

And that’s the point about clarity of purpose and direction.  You have to choose who you are going to be in life.  Let me say that again.  You have to choose who you are going to be in life.

Andre Agassi didn’t have a choice early on.  He was forced into a life and career as a professional tennis player by his overbearing father.  He hated the game for his first 29 years.  Finally, he realized that he could choose.  As he said, he chose tennis and became an elder statesman of the game.  He was inspiring to watch as he grew older.  In 2005 when he was 35 he got to the US Open final against roger Federer.  He played a great match, losing in four sets.  The crowd loved him and he loved the crowd — and tennis.

Now he has chosen to help others.  He has raised tons of money to help poor kids and runs a tuition free school for at risk youth in Las Vegas.  His story has a happy ending.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are clear on what they want in their lives and careers.  They use their clarity of purpose and direction as a touchstone to help them navigate the twists and turns life throws at them.  Once Andre Agassi “chose tennis” late in his career, he won six grand slam tournaments – to go with the two he won as a youngster. 

I choose to help others learn, grow and prosper in their lives and careers.  What have you chosen?  The answer to this question is the first step in clarifying your purpose and direction.

Clarity of purpose and direction is one of the keys to career and life success in my Common Sense Success System.  I discuss it in detail in several of my books: Straight Talk for Success, Your Success GPS and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success.

I remember reading Hamlet when I was in high school.  As Hamlet was setting off on his journey, Polonius gave him some advice.  As we got to this advice, the teacher stopped and said “This advice is timeless wisdom, pay attention.”  Here it is…

There … my blessing with thee!
And these few precepts hold in thy memory…

Look thou character.  Give thy thoughts no tongue,
Nor any unproportioned thought his act.
Be thou familiar, but by no means vulgar.

Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried,
Grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel;
But do not dull thy palm with entertainment
Of each new hatched, unfledged comrade. 

Beware of entrance to a quarrel but, being in,
Bear it that the opposed may beware of thee.

Give every man thy ear, but few thy voice;
Take each man’s measure, but reserve thy judgment.

Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy,
But not expressed in fancy; rich, not gaudy;
For the apparel oft proclaims the man;
And they in France of the best rank and station
Are of a most select and generous chief in that.

Neither a borrower, nor a lender be;
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.

This above all: to thine own self be true,
and it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst be false to no man.

Farewell; my blessing season this in thee!

The final piece of advice – “This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow as the night the day, thou canst be to no man” – is at the heart of clarity of purpose and direction.  It is much easier to be true to yourself when you are clear in your purpose and direction in life.  As Polonius suggests, if you are true to yourself, you can’t be false to others.  More important, you can stay on the course to career and life success.

Roy Blackman, my father-in-law was so enamored of this advice that it was his final words of advice to his first grandson as he went off to college.  Roy lived by these words.  They were his epitaph, displayed prominently on the program at his funeral.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people clarify their purpose and direction.  Then they conduct themselves in a manner that is consistent with it.  Shakespeare, speaking as Polonius, offers some timeless advice on how to live in a manner that is consistent with your purpose and direction: “To thine own self be true, and it must follow as the night the day, thou canst be false to no man.”  If you follow this advice you’ll be living your purpose and you’ll be well positioned to create the successful life and career you want and deserve.

That’s my take on Polonius’ advice to Hamlet and how it is as important today as it was when it was written hundreds of years ago.

Bud Bilanich is the author of seven books, including Straight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success. 

A while back I blogged about a book called The Luck Factor by Richard Wiseman who claims that you can learn to be lucky.  In fact, Dr. Wiseman even lists five steps for learning to be lucky.

First, don’t assume there is nothing you can do about any situation.  Make the decision to take control.

Second, do something now.

Third, make a list of various options.  Be creative.  Brainstorm.  Come up with as many ideas as you can.

Fourth, decide how you will move forward.  Consider every possible alternative.

Fifth, take action.  Be prepared to adapt your action as the future unfolds.

Richard Wiseman calls this a prescription for learning to be lucky.  I call it committing to taking personal responsibility for creating a successful life and career.  Every one of the five steps above is a manifestation of your willingness to commit to taking personal responsibility for your life and career.

Let’s look at them again. 

First, deciding that you can control a situation is the first step to controlling it.  It’s like throwing a mental switch that puts you in charge and demonstrates your commitment to taking personal responsibility for your life and success.

Second, the mere act of doing something moves you forward.  You may not be successful the first – or even second or third time – but the fact that you try and keep trying is another manifestation of your commitment to taking responsibility for your life and career.

Third, thinking through your options puts you in control.  Often, it may seem that your options are limited.  However, if you take the time to review everything you can do in a given situation, you’ll be able to come up with some good ideas for getting on top of any situation you face.

Fourth, choose an option, put it into play, and see what happens.  If it doesn’t work, choose another one.  If that doesn’t work, choose another one.  In this way, you are not only being systematic about creating your own success, you are demonstrating the resilience common to people who commit to taking personal responsibility for their success.

Fifth, be adaptable.  What works at first may no longer work as you move forward.  If you’re committed to taking personal responsibility for yourself and your success, you’ll change with the times.  You won’t sit back and bemoan the fact that things have changed.  You’ll be in charge, changing with the times – and even causing the times to change.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people commit to taking personal responsibility for their lives and careers.  You can demonstrate your commitment to taking personal responsibility for you success by doing five things:

1) Decide you are in control. 

2) Do something to show yourself you are in control. 

3) Think through all of your options in a given situation. 

4) Choose an option and act.  If it doesn’t work, choose another option. 

5) Be adaptable.  Change with the times. 

In The Luck Factor, Richard Wiseman calls these five steps a method for learning to be lucky.  I say they are a recipe for demonstrating your commitment to taking personal responsibility for your life and career.

Bud is the author of seven books, including Straight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success. 

P.S. If something bad happens here's what you do to keep the luck going:

Here are some tips from Richard Wiseman on distracting your thoughts away from ill fortune.

• Go to the gym – exercise is a great way to take your mind off your problems and it also lifts your mood.
• Watch a funny film – choose a film that makes you laugh, and try your best to become involved in the story.
• Spend about twenty minutes thinking about a positive event that happened in the past – relive the event in your mind and think about how you felt at the time.
• Listen to music – again, choose something that makes you feel happy, and try to become involved in the music.
• Arrange to see your friends – talk about what's happening in their lives.
  

The other day I came across a prayer attributed to Cary Grant.  I’ve edited it for brevity, but the important ideas are still there…“Release me from trying to straighten out everyone’s affairs. Make me thoughtful, but not moody, helpful but not overbearing. Take a look…

“Lord, keep me from the habit of thinking I must say something on every subject and on every occasion.  Keep my tongue free from the recital of endless details.

“Seal my lips on my aches and pains.  I ask for grace enough to listen to the retelling of others’ afflictions and to be helped to endure them with patience.

“Release me from trying to straighten out everyone’s affairs. Make me thoughtful, but not moody, helpful but not overbearing.

“Give me improved memory with growing humility and an ability to capitulate when my memory clashes with the memory of others. Teach me the glorious lesson that on some occasions, I may be mistaken.

“Keep me reasonably kind.  An embittered person is a constant burden.

“Please give me the ability to see good in unlikely places and talents in unexpected people. And give me the grace to tell them so.”

That is some prayer – and the embodiment of interpersonal competence.  Cary Grant asked for the gifts of: silence and listening; the ability to empathize with others’ afflictions without going into detail about his; the tendency to give unwanted and unasked for advice; the willingness to admit is mistakes; kindness; and the ability to see the good in others – and to tell them so.

I have printed this prayer and have hung it in my office.  I aspire to all of the characteristics for which Cary Grant prayed.  I hope that God will give me these gifts too.  Because if He does, I know I will become an interpersonally competent person.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are interpersonally competent.  Interpersonally competent people – listen to and empathize with others; avoid giving unwanted and unsolicited advice; admit their mistakes; are kind; see the good in others and tell them so.  This is a pretty high standard to set for yourself.  But, it’s best to set high goals.  So do yourself a favor and set the goal of living up to these ideals.  The people in your life will thank you, and you’ll be well on your way to becoming a truly interpersonally competent person.

That’s my take on Cary Grant’s prayer and interpersonal competence.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud is the author of seven books, including Straight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success. 

As I was researching self-confidence, I came across a Buddhist web site that had some interesting information.  I particularly liked a quote from the Dalai Lama, found about half-way down the web page, so I decided to include it here.

“One can be deceived by three types of laziness:
the laziness of indolence, which is the wish to procrastinate;
the laziness of inferiority, which is doubting your capabilities;
and the laziness that is attached to negative actions, or putting great effort into non-virtue.”

I like this quote, because it drives home an important point about personal responsibility and self confidence.  The Dalai Lama doesn’t let us off the hook.  He says it’s just plain lazy to say “I didn’t do it because I didn’t think I could do it.”  He says that doubting your abilities is a form of laziness.  That’s some tough love!

And if you think about it, he is right.  All too often we let ourselves off the hook by saying, “I’m not going to try that, because I don’t think I can do it.”  This is being lazy.  “I can’t do it, so I won’t even try:” as I read these words out loud, they sound pretty lame.  Agree?  If you do, you’ll stop using lack of self-confidence as an excuse for not doing the work it takes to become a star in your life and career.

The common sense point here is simple.  Self confidence is an important key to career and life success.  Self confident people are optimistic, they face their fears and act and they surround themselves with positive people. 

The Dalai Lama suggests that self doubt is a form of laziness.  He says that doubting yourself and your capabilities is a form of laziness, that he calls it the laziness of inferiority.  The next time you find yourself saying, “I can’t do that,” think of the Dalai Lama.  Are you just letting yourself off the hook by not even trying?  Only you can be the judge of that.  However, I have found that more often than not when I let my doubts get the better of me, I’m being lazy.

That’s my take on the Dalai Lama, self confidence and success.  What’s yours?  Please take a few minutes to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud is the author of seven books, including Straight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success. 

Dilbert approaches his boss (you know, the one with the tufts of hair that look like devil’s horns) and says, “The security audit accidentally locked all developers out of the system.”  The boss says, “Well, it is what it is.”

Dilbert says, “How does that help?”  The boss replies, “You don’t know what you don’t know.”  Dilbert, obviously frustrated, says, "Congratulations you’re the first human to fail the Turing test.”  The boss says, “What does that mean?”  Dilbert replies, “It is what it is;” to which the boss says, “Why didn’t you say so in the first place?”

There really is such a thing as a Turing test.  Dictionary.com defines it as follows: “A test proposed by British mathematician Alan Turing, and is often taken as a test of whether a computer has humanlike intelligence. If a panel of human beings conversing with an unknown entity (via keyboard, for example) believes that that entity is human, and if the entity is actually a computer, then the computer is said to have passed the Turing test.”

This is pretty funny.  It is also kind of sad as it is indicative of the lack of communication in today’s business world.  Scott Adams, Dilbert’s creator, really gets it when it comes to workplace dysfunctionality. 

There is a book called, Beyond Bullsh*t, by UCLA Anderson School of Management Professor, Samuel Culbert.  Professor Culbert defines bullsh*t in the following way:

“It is telling people what you think they need to hear.  It may involve finessing the truth or outright lying, but the purpose is always self serving.  And while I appreciate the role of some bullsh*t in keeping the corporate peace, it makes people feel beaten up, deceived – even dirty.  When people talk straight at work, companies make out better because the best idea usually wins.  In contrast, when people are bullsh*tting, they hide their mistakes and the company suffers. Straight talk is the product or relationships built on trust.”

Phrases like “it is what it is” are not straight talk.  They are part of the inexplicable jargon that has overtaken us.  Dynamic communicators say what they mean, in an easily understood manner. 

Remember Elliot Spitzer?  I read an article about him in Time Magazine that began this way: “His visage described discountenance.”  Eliot Spitzer wrote those words about a character in a short story for his high school literary magazine.  People would have more easily understood him if he had described the character by saying “he was unhappy’.”

I’m not holding Elliot Spitzer up to ridicule for something he wrote when he was in high school.  However, there is a point about dynamic communication to be made here.  Dynamic communicators don’t show off their large vocabularies.  Instead, they choose words that are the most easily understood.

The common sense point here is clear.  Successful people are competent.  Dynamic communication is an important career and life success competency.  Dynamics communicators eschew, I mean don’t use, jargon.  They avoid meaningless phrases like “it is what it is” to explain something.  They use the simplest words possible to get across their ideas.  And they don’t bulls*it.  They say what they mean.  Follow these four rules in conversation, writing and presenting and you’ll become known as a dynamic communicator.

That’s my take on simple language and communication effectiveness.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  If you have a favorite Dilbert cartoon about communication skills, please share that with us too.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud is the author of seven books, including Straight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success. 

It’s not difficult to create positive personal impact, but you do have to work at it.  I have a model of customer service that I use with my consulting clients. It begins from the premise that after any interaction your customers “rate” you. The people in your life R.A.T.E. you too.  You can use your R.A.T.E.ing to build positive personal impact.  It works like this…

• R stands for Responsiveness;
• A stands for Assurance;
• T stands for Tangibles; and
• E stands for Empathy.

If you notice, only one of the four points in the model – tangibles – is what you actually do for or deliver to the people in your life. The other three are the emotional measures by which people judge you. These emotional measures are at least as important as the tangibles you deliver, especially when it comes to creating positive personal impact.

You have to deliver the tangibles. You must produce results. That’s the cost of a ticket to the personal and professional success sweepstakes.

However, you have to pay attention to the other three factors – responsiveness, assurance, and empathy – if you’re going to make a positive personal impact while you’re performing. Let’s look at each of these three in detail.

Responsiveness. You have to ensure that the people in your life see you as someone who is willing to help; someone who understands what needs to be done and is willing to do it. Other people need to think that you will give them what they want, when they want it, and in a manner that they can use it.

Assurance. You have to be able to convey trust and confidence. People need to feel that you are going to deliver. To do this, you must be very knowledgeable about the people in your life and their needs and wants. You need to be clear on what you can offer them to help them meet their goals. You need to ensure that they are confident that you will do what you say you will do.

Empathy. The people in your life must perceive you as an individual who understands, cares about, and pays attention to their needs. To do this, you need to be willing to walk a mile in your customers’ shoes. You have to demonstrate to them that you are aware of and sensitive to their unique and individual needs.

The common sense point here is simple. Successful people create positive personal impact.  If you want to create positive personal impact, you must do more than deliver results, look good, and act graciously. You need to get high R.A.T.E.ings from the people in your life.  You have to be seen by others as a person who is responsive to their requests. You have to build trust with these individuals, and you need to demonstrate that you understand their needs and issues.  Focus on finding ways to be responsive, assuring and empathic and you’ll create positive personal impact.

That’s my take on creating positive personal impact by improving your R.A.T.E.ings with other people to create positive personal impact and build your success.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud Bilanich is the author of seven books, including Straight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success. 

I was paging through the August issue of The Oprah Magazine (yes guys, there’s good stuff for us in there too), and came across an article by Martha Beck called “The Praise Drug.”  The article began with a story about Sarah…

“Sarah was an addict…a few hours after she’d glowingly received an award, she was curled up in bed, anxious, needy, already jonesing for a fix.  Sarah was abusing something more powerful, insidious and accessible than any street drug: the adoration and esteem of others that some psychologists call narcissistic supply.  Simply put, she was addicted to praise.  Her entire life revolved around eliciting positive attention from others.”

People like Sarah are never good conversationalists, because they turn every conversation into an opportunity to talk about themselves.  And, talking only about yourself – no matter how interesting you think you are – doesn’t make you a sparkling conversationalist, it brands you as a bore.

Several years ago, I saw a cartoon in the newspaper.  Two women were in a conversation at a party.  Woman number one says, “But enough about me, let’s talk about you.  What do you think of my dress?”

I’m sure you know people like this.  Recently Cathy and I were with another couple.  The woman was a talker.  By the end of our time together, we knew everything about her, her children, her grandchildren and her friends and their children and grandchildren.  She knew very little about us – for two reasons.  First, she never asked.  Second, she was so busy speaking about herself that she never gave us any time to speak about ourselves. 

From the little (or depending on how you think about it, the lot) I know this woman, I’m sure she thinks she is a dynamite conversationalist – always keeping things going, never a dull moment, willing to share the details of her life.  Unfortunately she is wrong.  A good conversationalist demonstrates more interest in others than himself or herself.

I saw a quote on line the other day.  I’m sorry I can’t remember it exactly, but it went something like…

A self centered person enters a room and says, “Here I am.”  A gracious person enters a room and says, “Ah, there you are.”

Good conversationalists are gracious, not self centered.  They enter each conversation letting the other person know that he or she is important and that they want to learn about him or her.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are dynamic communicators.  Dynamic communicators are excellent conversationalists.  The essence of good conversation is a willingness to listen to, and learn from, others.  People who are addicted to praise, those whose “narcissistic supply” is in short supply, are seldom good conversationalists.  In seeking the approval of others, they speak only of themselves and their lives.  They seldom take the time to engage other people in conversation and listen to what they have to say.  If you want to become a good conversation, get interested in other people.  Learn about them and their lives.  They’ll reciprocate and give you the chance to talk about you and your life.

That’s my take on the addiction to praise and how it hampers effective conversation.  What’s yours?  Please take a few minutes to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Dynamic communication skills are one of the keys to personal and professional success that I discuss in several of my books: Straight Talk for Success, Your Success GPS and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success.

I saw an interesting quote from Arianna Huffington the other day…

"The fastest way to break the cycle of perfectionism and become fearless is to give up the idea of doing it perfectly - indeed to embrace uncertainty and imperfection."

This is some great common sense advice.  Perfectionism will result in procrastination.  And procrastination will feed your fear. 

When you want to do something, do it.  The other day I retweeted some great common sense advice by my friend Stephanie Frank…

“If it takes less than five minutes, don’t write it down.  Just do it now.”

Action, action, action is the key to self confidence and career and life success.  Perfectionism is one of the barriers to action.  When I am coaching people on writing, I give them this advice…

“Write fast.  Get your thoughts down on the computer screen (or paper if you’re old fashioned) quickly.  Don’t worry about spelling and grammar.  Just get your thoughts out of your head.  There will be plenty of time to go back and edit.”

That’s how I write this blog – quickly.  Most of my posts are in the 500 – 600 range.  It takes me about 15 minutes to write them and another 15 to edit them.  I couldn’t do five posts a week if I spent much more time writing.

I didn’t let perfectionism stop me when I began writing this blog.  When I began blogging more than 1,000 posts ago, I didn’t have a clue about how to write a good blog.  I knew I had some things to say that many people might find helpful and interesting, so I had a friend show me how to set up and post to a blog, and I began writing.

I didn’t burden myself with perfectionist questions like, “What’s the right format?”  “How long should my posts be?”  “How do I add links?” slow me down.  I just started writing.  The rest came later as I read other blogs and saw what I liked and what I didn’t.

I took action – and here I am over 1,000 posts later.

The same is true with my books.  I write them quickly, edit them for content, and then have someone else proofread them.  Quite frankly, if I stopped to think how much work goes into writing a book, I might never have written one – let alone 10.

Paul Meyer is one of the true legends in the personal growth business.  I have his quote, “Whatever you can vividly imagine, ardently desire, sincerely believe and enthusiastically act upon, must inevitably come to pass,” hanging just inside the door to my office.  I read it every time I go in or out of my office.  I live my life by these words.

I saw another quote from Mr. Meyer in an email from Brian Tracy the other day…

“90% of all those who fail are not defeated.  They simply quit.”

Of these 90%, I think that some many don’t even get started.  The let perfectionism, or some other fear, get in their way.  You’ve got to play if you want to win.

I was speaking with a friend and client the other day.  The top job in his specialty for his division is coming open as the senior VP is retiring in December.  He told me that the same day he learned of the retirement, he updated his resume and sent it and a note to the head of the division asking to be considered for the soon to be vacant job.

He didn’t wait.  He didn’t say, “I’m not experienced enough.”  He didn’t spend weeks revising his resume until it was “perfect.”  He took action – and is a top candidate for the position.

One last quote from Henry Ford that popped up after I wrote the first draft of this post…

“One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn't do.”

Think about it…

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are self confident.  Self confident people take action.  They don’t let their fears, or their perfectionism trap them into procrastinating.  If you want to succeed you need to be self confident.  If you want to become self confident you need to face your fears – and any other impediment to your success – and act.  James Malinchak gives out rubber bracelets at his seminars that say “GSDF – Get Stuff Done Fast.”  Speed is often more important that perfect quality – unless you’re planning a space mission.  Build your self confidence by taking action.

That’s my take on self confidence, action and success.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts on action and procrastination with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Self confidence is one of the keys to career and life success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success, 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success and Your Success GPS.  If you want to become self confident you need to do three things.  First, become an optimist.  Choose to believe that today will be better than yesterday and tomorrow will be better than today.  Second, face your fears and act.  Procrastination and inaction feed fear.  Action cures it.  Third, surround yourself with positive people.